Birthday Dinner, part 2

And to test him on Thursday, I told him that I am going to Vegas in January...and did he want to go. I don't know what got into me--cause I would have been very upset to hear no. Much to my surprise, he said yes. I was like what the fuck, again--in my head. How does someone tell you they have a girlfriend, and then say yes to going away for the weekend.

As i said--I don't remember alot of that night...it was like a steel door came down to protect me emotionally. I haven't been hungry since that night, a well, I seem to be disconnected from my emotions.

Here is some of what i remember him saying:

"You are obsessed with me"
"I don't want whatever we have to end."
"I am not ending this."
"You have done so much for me. I will always be here for you."
"I have something going with C."

So obviously, he and I are going to have to talk. It is all very murky as to what I said, or what even triggered this--except him holding my hand. I am 99.9% sure that I did not entwine my fingers with his, because I know that I shouldn't do that.

Since we got back from the cruise on December 4--we have spent almost everyday together, either in person or on the phone. Maybe there were 4 days total that we didn't see each other.

What is going on????

He went home for Christmas, and at 2am, Saturday morning, he text me asking if i want to play poker. I said yes...and we talked on the phone and played poker until 7am in the morning. Again it was as if nothing had happened...and he said he definitely is going to Vegas with me. WOW. I told him that he was going to like his Christmas presents...and he said you don't have to get me anything...and I said I know...I want to...and I had most of it by your birthday!

Crazy! Crazy! Crazy!