I feel like Alice falling down the rabbit hole. I have met someone who matches my sexual appetite....who is also kind and loving...and respectful.....and handsome.
We are just at the tip of the iceberg in all ways....but I am falling falling falling....hard...hard...hard...
It is unexpected....and so delightful....exciting and scary at the same time...
WOWOW....
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Fantasy Night
There is a guy that I have been attracted to for some time, and he came home about a month ago...and he came back into my life. Thanksgiving night, I got a hotel room...with a whirlpool tub, candles, music, and wore lingerie for the first time ever.
It was a magical night....he showed up at 8pm, and we slept for maybe a total of two hours before I left at 930am. So gentle, kind, patient....it was perfect.
Of course I wanted to see him again...and on Sunday night, we had our first date...lol...as in away from people that we know...in public...together....and it was wonderful....he is wonderful.
He lives 2.5 hours away...he is kind...intelligent...gorgeous....and talks about his feelings...
I haven't heard from him today....and I am missing him so much.
I'm afraid...because he feels important....special....and i am worried that I am going to get hurt...big time....we fit perfectly together....my spirit seems to resonate with him...and that is the scary part for me....
It was a magical night....he showed up at 8pm, and we slept for maybe a total of two hours before I left at 930am. So gentle, kind, patient....it was perfect.
Of course I wanted to see him again...and on Sunday night, we had our first date...lol...as in away from people that we know...in public...together....and it was wonderful....he is wonderful.
He lives 2.5 hours away...he is kind...intelligent...gorgeous....and talks about his feelings...
I haven't heard from him today....and I am missing him so much.
I'm afraid...because he feels important....special....and i am worried that I am going to get hurt...big time....we fit perfectly together....my spirit seems to resonate with him...and that is the scary part for me....
Thursday, June 25, 2009
balancing 4 guys
is getting difficult----especially when 2 are potential, and 2 i have already slept with....and i am having fun with the potentials....and i get a booty call....and miss out on amazing sex with David.
i have been spending alot of time with young David....he went on a roadtrip with me.
last thursday, ben and kris met me at a bar....and we all ended up together, playing cards til the bar closed. Was fun....and strange....people said that ben was definitely flirting....and so on sunday night, kris came to see me, and Ben asked me if i had called him for a booty call....he said it jokingly....but....i didn't like it.....and i said i don't do that.....and he said, me neither ....last time was 7 months ago.
And kris asked me what his deal is because he said that Ben hit him in the kidney...which is so juvenile.....and i talked with ben afterwards for a bit...and we made plans for tuesday....but today is thursday...and he hasn't called or text me since sunday....i don't understand it....
young david wants to go wherever i go tonight.....kris probably will be out tonight....don't know about Ben....but i am sure that David is going to want to see me, too.
i have been spending alot of time with young David....he went on a roadtrip with me.
last thursday, ben and kris met me at a bar....and we all ended up together, playing cards til the bar closed. Was fun....and strange....people said that ben was definitely flirting....and so on sunday night, kris came to see me, and Ben asked me if i had called him for a booty call....he said it jokingly....but....i didn't like it.....and i said i don't do that.....and he said, me neither ....last time was 7 months ago.
And kris asked me what his deal is because he said that Ben hit him in the kidney...which is so juvenile.....and i talked with ben afterwards for a bit...and we made plans for tuesday....but today is thursday...and he hasn't called or text me since sunday....i don't understand it....
young david wants to go wherever i go tonight.....kris probably will be out tonight....don't know about Ben....but i am sure that David is going to want to see me, too.
Friday, June 05, 2009
kris
a new guy....who seems to be open to having me around...he has invited me to be with he and his friends...two times now! And last night he came to see me too!
everyone thinks he is cute....and he is 30...with a 4 year old son. he is polite and funny...very similar to ben in demeanor and personality.
nice.....
everyone thinks he is cute....and he is 30...with a 4 year old son. he is polite and funny...very similar to ben in demeanor and personality.
nice.....
Ben
So after my intoxicating afternoon, i was taking Ben out to dinner for his birthday....we went to the same place again...and we were together for 3 hours...and we laughed and talked so well together. He's so easy and wonderful...and sexy to me....
I can't wait to see him again.....hopefully tonight.
i didn't have his presents ready for him.....what is that about?
I can't wait to see him again.....hopefully tonight.
i didn't have his presents ready for him.....what is that about?
Intoxicating Sex
i have never experienced getting drunk off of sex....ever.....
last Thursday, i met up with David...and the verbal foreplay was hot...then he started touching...and it was time to go somewhere....
but first...he admitted that he lives with someone...the mother of his son....but i still don't know if I believe him...especially when he says he is with her to make sure that he can have his son in his life. And he is out at night--almost every night....did he make up this person to keep me at bay??
Anyway, we went to a park near my house...because i trust him enough to share my body with him...but not bring him to my home...it was after midnight, and the air was cool, and the stars and moon were wonderful....We started making out....and i began to feel drunk...and then we were beyond gone...and we had crazy, uncontrolled sex in the park...i felt like an addict that couldn't get enough....i felt like anita blake when she is with her lycan and vamp....
We parted ways...and i didn't see him all weekend. Tuesday morning, i get a text asking me what i am doing today? me? So i found a hotel....and we had sex, amazing sex for 5 hours.....and again...i couldn't get enough of him....and he is so beautiful...and perfect in bed...I have Chris all over again...i just have to make sure the craziness doesn't start up...
This feeling of drunkeness is so strange...so different from anything that i have felt before...but...now in writing...it is like a fire under my skin...that only the coolness of his skin can assuage...and i can't seem to think or process too much information when we are together.
And i am so turned on....all the time.....morning noon and night....its crazy....
**********
last night i got so incredibly jealous....and upset that i couldnt even talk to David.....
so i opted to go hangout with another guy...and it was good clean fun!
last Thursday, i met up with David...and the verbal foreplay was hot...then he started touching...and it was time to go somewhere....
but first...he admitted that he lives with someone...the mother of his son....but i still don't know if I believe him...especially when he says he is with her to make sure that he can have his son in his life. And he is out at night--almost every night....did he make up this person to keep me at bay??
Anyway, we went to a park near my house...because i trust him enough to share my body with him...but not bring him to my home...it was after midnight, and the air was cool, and the stars and moon were wonderful....We started making out....and i began to feel drunk...and then we were beyond gone...and we had crazy, uncontrolled sex in the park...i felt like an addict that couldn't get enough....i felt like anita blake when she is with her lycan and vamp....
We parted ways...and i didn't see him all weekend. Tuesday morning, i get a text asking me what i am doing today? me? So i found a hotel....and we had sex, amazing sex for 5 hours.....and again...i couldn't get enough of him....and he is so beautiful...and perfect in bed...I have Chris all over again...i just have to make sure the craziness doesn't start up...
This feeling of drunkeness is so strange...so different from anything that i have felt before...but...now in writing...it is like a fire under my skin...that only the coolness of his skin can assuage...and i can't seem to think or process too much information when we are together.
And i am so turned on....all the time.....morning noon and night....its crazy....
**********
last night i got so incredibly jealous....and upset that i couldnt even talk to David.....
so i opted to go hangout with another guy...and it was good clean fun!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Great night
tonight was a great night.....I got to play poker with Ben...and I brought us dinner...and we joked....and then we were outside for half an hour...joking...and it is just so absolutely amazing when I am with him....he is so open...and I just feel great around him....he remembers everything we've talked about....and he references them....and I am so at peace with him...I don't think about sex or anything...just how nice it feels to be with him. When he got knocked out...he sat by me and watched me play....and gave me comedy relief. He did a good joke on me when I called him earlier....he pretended to be his answering machine.
David showed up....and I felt the "sizing" up going on.....and that may be why Ben left...I don't know....I am glad new David wasn't there. He said he had to go to the gym...take supplements and go to bed. He's not acting like he's interested....we'll see.
But...I need to back up to Sunday night...when we were celebrating Tony's birthday. I was drinking...lots of shots....and alcohol...and I drunkenly text Ben to see if he could come play....and I was playing, and the next thing I knew, he was there...behind me in a purple shirt...with the maroon that so becomes him....and I grabbed my heart....because it wanted to leap out from my chest. I was so elated to see him....and he even knew that it had been three weeks since we were last together. In my drunken stupor, I did talk to him about not texting me, and that I had been about ready to remove him from my phone...and he said please don't do that. He had a button misbuttoned...so I fixed it...and he said, don't undress me here....so later I text him if undressing him was even in the realm of possibility....and I don't remember what we talked about....he used the word complicated.
But we did talk by his truck---twice.....for almost 20 minutes each time. I did tell him that I am a guy's best friend....
Down side of the night is that I text both David's that I was drunk and wanted to be f*cked. David responded and wanted me to call him.....new David didn't respond.
David showed up....and I felt the "sizing" up going on.....and that may be why Ben left...I don't know....I am glad new David wasn't there. He said he had to go to the gym...take supplements and go to bed. He's not acting like he's interested....we'll see.
But...I need to back up to Sunday night...when we were celebrating Tony's birthday. I was drinking...lots of shots....and alcohol...and I drunkenly text Ben to see if he could come play....and I was playing, and the next thing I knew, he was there...behind me in a purple shirt...with the maroon that so becomes him....and I grabbed my heart....because it wanted to leap out from my chest. I was so elated to see him....and he even knew that it had been three weeks since we were last together. In my drunken stupor, I did talk to him about not texting me, and that I had been about ready to remove him from my phone...and he said please don't do that. He had a button misbuttoned...so I fixed it...and he said, don't undress me here....so later I text him if undressing him was even in the realm of possibility....and I don't remember what we talked about....he used the word complicated.
But we did talk by his truck---twice.....for almost 20 minutes each time. I did tell him that I am a guy's best friend....
Down side of the night is that I text both David's that I was drunk and wanted to be f*cked. David responded and wanted me to call him.....new David didn't respond.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
David
Today, I was lying in the sun....and I got the thought that I have been waiting 20 years for someone with the same sexual energy as Chris....20 freaking years....wowow....
And although we've been texting....we haven't seen each other. Friday, I told him that I can't concentrate....and keep imagining....and I am....the things we did, and what I want to do with him....
I told him I have a bruise....and he told me he had scratches all over his back....and they were still stinging....I didn't think I dug so much...but wow....
I really want him....and not just sexually....he is a nice guy...and I also remembered that I actually laid my head on his shoulder....like I felt safe.....
He has two children....2.5 and 18!!! wowow....he had his baby all weekend...that's cool!
And although we've been texting....we haven't seen each other. Friday, I told him that I can't concentrate....and keep imagining....and I am....the things we did, and what I want to do with him....
I told him I have a bruise....and he told me he had scratches all over his back....and they were still stinging....I didn't think I dug so much...but wow....
I really want him....and not just sexually....he is a nice guy...and I also remembered that I actually laid my head on his shoulder....like I felt safe.....
He has two children....2.5 and 18!!! wowow....he had his baby all weekend...that's cool!
Ben
I am so confused by him......I didn't hear from him all week (Monday) and Friday, he text me that he was sorry for being out of contact, and that he might see me that night. I replied a positive cheery....hope to see you. And then again...dead silence. Yesterday, I sent another message saying that I hoped everything was okay...and that his apology meant much. Again...no answer.
Jorene made the comment that he has me on pushme/pullyou mode....and there is some truth to that. In fact, I almost took his number out of my phone...cuz I don't know if I can take it. My heart already chose him....and I hate that I can't get him out.....it's his energy....and the memory of our day at the park, with our dogs....was a best day ever.
I hope he comes out tonight....I miss him
Jorene made the comment that he has me on pushme/pullyou mode....and there is some truth to that. In fact, I almost took his number out of my phone...cuz I don't know if I can take it. My heart already chose him....and I hate that I can't get him out.....it's his energy....and the memory of our day at the park, with our dogs....was a best day ever.
I hope he comes out tonight....I miss him
Friday, May 08, 2009
More...
I am horny as hell because of my escapade on Tuesday, and Ben has disappeared again. He hasn't answered any text since Monday night....so bizarre. I don't know what to make of him.
My tennis pro has been coming around every night...I saw him two nights in a row...but alas....no sex...he had a stressful night last night with his ex-girlfriend. Maybe tomorrow night...since last Friday we had a comedy of errors when our plan was to spend the night together.
I did absolutely no work on my house today....despite the fact that I want to have David over....immediately to f*ck all night long...
We'll see what happens this weekend....on of my other 25 year old crushes is coming to town for his birthday, and he wants to hang out and celebrate it....
wow....i am lucky!
My tennis pro has been coming around every night...I saw him two nights in a row...but alas....no sex...he had a stressful night last night with his ex-girlfriend. Maybe tomorrow night...since last Friday we had a comedy of errors when our plan was to spend the night together.
I did absolutely no work on my house today....despite the fact that I want to have David over....immediately to f*ck all night long...
We'll see what happens this weekend....on of my other 25 year old crushes is coming to town for his birthday, and he wants to hang out and celebrate it....
wow....i am lucky!
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